I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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