I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it