Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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