So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
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