Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I think a kid would responsible me up
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
Randomize
