i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Randomize
