Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Randomize
