Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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