wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Randomize
