giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
