There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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