You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
