some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
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