The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize