great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
