I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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