were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Randomize