just tell him i said nine months
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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