She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
