it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize