youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize