well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
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