i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
