No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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