I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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