so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize