yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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