I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
These Are 23 Of The Most Uncomfortable Questions You Can Ask
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
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I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina