So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
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