Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
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