just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
