Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
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didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
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When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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