We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
