i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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