I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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