How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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