Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize