So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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