Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
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