my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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