ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
