All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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