At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize