remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?