i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
nutella sex= disaster
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
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