She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
3 2 1 whiskey
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
