i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
