It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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