my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
