Screwed.edu
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize