Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
